i feel like i am going to explode

...in the best way possible

Here is a letter recently written to Dr. Phyllis Povell, today's Good Thing, who made me think and laugh a bit this past weekend, which will maybe summarize my general sentiment better than the long-winded & poorly organized exposition I had posted earlier:

Hello, Dr. Povell--

We met in the AMS hub in Boston-- you saw me browsing your book and joked, "Hey, if it'll make ya buy it, I'll sign it for ya..." and "I don't know who that author is, but I hear she's *nasty*!"

Of course you won me over right there, and I hadn't even really gotten into your book at that point!

I saw you speak the following day, and the whole bus ride back to NYC and all morning today, I have been engrossed in that book.

Thank you so much for writing it. Thank you so much for speaking at the conference. Thank you so much for having this bright and shining mind, and for sharing it with all of us, everywhere. I know the Montessori Life ladies said in their workshop, "Try not to use the word 'inspiring.' It's so over-used! It's ceasing to mean anything..." which is true, but at the same time, in some cases it is still the best word that fits. Your writing, your speaking, your intelligence and humor are gifts through which I feel literally inspired. I feel like something bright and energizing has been breathed into me, and I can't wait to use this energy.

I have been working in Montessori for 15 years, now, and have always loved it-- My friends who graduated college and went into finance or education or law or even the culinary arts have shifted positions in their hierarchies or industries and climbed and amassed small fortunes, and when they express surprise that I am doing more or less exactly what I was doing in 1995, I have enjoyed the fact that I am still as much in love with my job now as I was 15 years ago-- perhaps more in love, even. When my friends tell me about frustration or emptiness and the resulting career switches, I realize that I was lucky enough to hit my target with the first shot. Although the general passing of my day today resembles very closely the passing of any other school day a decade ago, no two days have ever been the same, and no two days have ever felt boring or beneath my time and utmost attention. And of course, not a single day has passed without its moments of joy.

Still, over the past few years, I've felt this itch... not to begin an "industry climb" or to amass some small fortune, as many of my friends have done, but to do something larger. I feel as though I have by now built some strength in these teaching wings, and that I'd like to stretch them out a bit and see how far they can reach. I had my first experience as a Master Teacher last year, and I have watched my former intern stretch her own young wings and take on the responsibility of her own classroom this year-- a position she is handling with pedagogical skill and a grace of personality that has bloomed with her confidence (I had little to do with that!). This is my first year as a Field Consultant for the Princeton Center for Teacher Education, and I have enjoyed observing other interns and sharing what I can about how to open up to new helpful habits, new ways to grow. Beginning this summer, I will be taking on the role of Director of Curriculum at my school in Jersey City, and I'm so excited to create resources for the young and excited staff we are building over there. I'm liking this "teaching teachers" thing! I'm proud to be a part of this tradition, and excited to do more!

Listening to all these gray- and silver-haired AMS Elders this past weekend, I saw that a teacher's career can span decades without ever growing old, and in that time, it can take many forms. Listening and reading your own book, I see how important, and what a responsibility it is, for teachers with sound foundations and strong hearts to grow up and in their turn share what they have learned, to take on positions of leadership-- large or small, I know there are so many different kinds of leadership roles-- in their teaching communities. So: I *want* to. I want to honor the legacies of Maria & Nancy & all the other giants of this profession by carrying on their work. I want to help out with New Jersey Montessori Administrators Council, which has nurtured my own experience as a Montessori teacher since my very first role as a sub and assistant in 1995. I want to give back to AMS by helping students of the teaching profession, either by assisting my training program as opportunities arise, or reading other peoples' writing and pushing their writing further along into the public. Or, who knows, by writing and publishing, myself.

As I said, I feel *energized*! Activated! It was probably a while in coming-- there was a slow, decade+ long build. But you, your book & your own energy hit a button and crystallized that energy in me into something that must materialize. I'm so grateful! And I'm sooo excited!

For all of that: Thank you! Thank you so much.

Yours sincerely,
MS